Favelisms

"Are we crazy? ::shrug:: A little bit."

"Epics can't have happy love. It has to be love that causes war and death."

"This is how you hedge your bets as a historian: circa."

"If you don't have walls, you aren't a real city state. It's like not having a sports team."

"Washington lied all the time in war. It's totally brilliant to do that. ... ... In Jesus, ok?"

"Socrates would have lived longer if he hadn't died."

"Geese are mean. Geese will mess you up."

"Christians played dirty. They had to; the Romans were killing them."

"Thomas Jefferson cam 2000 years too late. He would have made a great Roman."

"This is what we do to tyrants! We step on then when they're dead."

"Matricide: killing your mom."

"Thales. Wha-les. Water, get it?"

"I like that on your shirt, or your pot...or whatever."

"Oh, look! Gazelles!"

"It's a horse, but it's abstract."

"I'll talk more about that nudity stuff later..."

"Why are the Greeks making all these nude statues and stuff? They're not just sickos!"

"What I want you to see is that these guys are naked."

"He's nude!...because he's perfect."

"Not all Greeks are gay."

"Monogamously challenged..."

"Pagan temple? Let's put a church on top. We win."

"Why did the gods kill everyone? Their stereos were too loud."

"Mr. Herpes..I MEAN HERMES!"

"He's a hero, and heroes don't torture sheep!"

"That's the worst right? Torturing your sheep? That's lame!"

".....brother/husband."

When you win the Olympics you bring home the laural ranch…rantha….wreath.

You’re such a lovely bull! Let me get on your back: which, ladies, is not a good thing to do, just getting on the back of random bulls.

I play loosey goosey with my terms

And this is related to mama which is breast… WHOA.

Hermes: the Twitter god.

You don’t want to be whipped by the crazy Russians.

Tyrants are nice people. They build parks.

OH! It’s a puppy!

Mysteries of farming and mysteries of babies are the same.

The sea people invaded me while I was studying.

God didn't flip a celestial coin: Heads, let's wait for marriage; Tails, be free little beasts.

Monogamously challenged...